Two years ago, my father passed away. He was not only a wonderful person but also a successful entrepreneur who had built a stable financial future for my brother and me. We always knew we could rely on his support and felt secure about the future. He managed a large company and several stores, and my brother and I had many plans ahead of us.
However, seven years ago, everything changed. My father fell ill. The diagnosis given by the doctors was a real shock to us. We hoped that money and the best specialists would help him overcome the disease. We invested enormous sums in treatment and searched for doctors all over the world. We believed he would defeat the illness and live a long and happy life. Unfortunately, the disease proved stronger, and despite all our efforts, he couldn’t win the battle.
When the doctors told us there was no hope left, our lives changed completely. It was a terrible moment for our whole family, but the most painful part was how some of our relatives behaved.
Mom, with whom we had always lived as a family, decided at that moment that she couldn’t bear to see my father suffer. She said she couldn’t stay by his side, take care of him, or watch him die. This came as a complete shock to us. Her words sounded selfish and cruel. Mom left, abandoning us with our father in such a difficult moment. She went away to avoid fear and pain, focusing solely on herself.
I wasn’t surprised because my mom had always been mostly focused on her own affairs. She was ten years younger than my father and had once helped him a little with his business, but she quickly lost interest. If only she had cared a little about the family—but no, all household responsibilities fell on my grandmother, while she continued living her life—beauty salons, fitness, traveling the world. My father knew how distant she was from family duties, yet he still loved her.
When my father’s illness worsened, I made the decision to move in with him and take care of him. My brother and his wife also helped as much as they could, but our mom was still absent, though she would occasionally ask for money.
My father always said, “She’s my wife, I love her. It’s hard for her; this is how she copes with pain.” For me, it was difficult to understand because she had left him in his most difficult moment. But my father always found a way to justify her actions, and I knew I couldn’t change how he felt about her.
A whole year passed after my father’s death, and my mother neither called nor visited. We thought she had completely cut us out of her life. However, everything changed when she found out that my father’s entire estate, including the inheritance, was left to my brother and me, and she received nothing. The moment she learned about it, she contacted us immediately.
“I have no money left,” she said without a hint of shame. “You have to support me.”
This statement was a complete shock to us. Mom believed that we should take care of her and that she had the right to demand it. My brother, of course, was stunned and asked her:
“Why do you think that? Our father left you everything he could, and now you have no right to ask us for support.”
“Your father always took care of me,” she replied without the slightest embarrassment.
I felt unimaginable disappointment and pain. Mom had always been with my father, yet in his hardest moments, when he needed her the most, she abandoned him. I couldn’t just turn a blind eye to her selfishness and demands for help, so I told her:
“I’m sorry, Mom, but you won’t get a single penny from me. You left when he was struggling, and now that he’s gone, you want us to support you? I can’t be that generous.
She jumped up, started yelling, and accused us of being ungrateful. She claimed that our father would condemn us, that we had no right to act this way, and that we were unfair and cruel. After that incident, she never called again or tried to contact us.
Now I find myself facing a difficult question: what should I do next? Should I forgive her? Should I try to restore a relationship that seems impossible to fix? Sometimes I think that if my father were still alive, he would have found the right words and helped us mend things with our mother. But now, it’s entirely up to us. My brother and I must decide how to move forward.
It’s hard for me to forget her behavior. I understand that my mother might have been going through difficult times as well, but I can’t forgive her heartlessness and selfishness during the hardest moment of our lives. I can no longer be the person who forgives everything.
Now I have to decide what to do with this pain and disappointment. Should I continue my relationship with my mother, or is it better to close this chapter for good?
